"Are you pursuing the object of your affection, wondering what the best way is to woo her and make her yours? I have some advice for you! Make soothing noises. Approach slowly, palms outstretched, radiating love. Maybe pet her head. This is, I believe, how I got my girlfriend! The same approach has gotten me absolutely nowhere with her cat."
"You asked for advice on how to flirt with this chick “in a way that’s subtle enough to fly over a straight girl’s head, but be picked up on by LBPQ woman.” I don’t know of any existing term for this particular thing, but it really seems like there should be one, right? I move that we should all adopt the term “cat whistling” to describe this activity. Like dog whistling, but gayer. A gentler, respectful alternative to cat calling. Just think about it. You can get back to me."
"Cat Lady’s wife enters the room and looks at her with dismay. “Honey, did you really dress our child in a Siamese cat hat and kitty face infant creeper? I’m concerned.” Cat Lady cocks her head to the side and stares at her wife unblinkingly for several long moments. She says nothing, then wordlessly wanders into the next room as if she owns it. (She does.)"
"I march as an outlet for my rage and sadness. I want to be with my sisters in the streets as we publicly mourn the futures that were stolen from us when Russian interference and American misogyny issued their one-two punch to deny us our first female president. I want to punch back, loudly refuting the lies our country has been sold about who is worthy of respect and dignity. (Hint: it's more than fucking cis-het, white, wealthy men.) I want to shout my outrage from Capitol Hill to the White House, Park Slope to Oakland, Chelsea to the Castro. Sea to shining gay-ass sea."
"To imply that affirmative consent policies turn well-meaning gentlemen into unknowing rapists is to reject the real world in favor of fantasy. Because we do not live in a world where people fabricate stories about sexual assault and report their bumbling but well-meaning sex partners willy nilly — statistically, false rape reports are extremely rare."
"I think that part of the reason many of us have become invested in the idea of inherent queerness is that it’s an easy narrative to defend. People generally understand why discrimination against minority groups is wrong, thanks to the hard work put in by black civil rights activists (and women’s rights groups after them, and immigrant groups, etc). By slotting queer people into this familiar framework, our struggles become quickly comprehensible."
"To me, calling yourself "feminist" doesn’t just mean that you believe abstractly that men and women are equal. It means that you’re actively engaged with the idea of gender equality. You see the inequality in the world and are bothered by it enough to want to make it better. Feminism is a political philosophy necessitating action – even if the only action you’re able to take right now is to read about feminism online."
""Oh, that’s totally you! That could be the title of your memoir: The Emoji Woman," she joked, and I found myself wanting to wrap myself up in her laugh like bedsheets. After I went home, we continued conversing over text. When she started sending me strings of silly emoji, I swooned so hard I almost died. Romance in 2015 is a funny thing."
"I'm not saying that all male gamers are the type to creepily stalk and threaten women; the people harassing Zoe Quinn, Anita Sarkeesian and Brianna Wu are extremists. But what I am saying is that by remaining silent, male gamers participate in a culture that allows extremists to feel as though the crowd is generally behind them. All they’re doing, after all, is taking things to the next level."
"While they picked out the shards of teeth and glass from my hair, I focused on their name tags. As they wiped me off with a sponge, I complimented their teamwork and tried to make small talk, writing words on a pad of paper when the newly jagged terrain of my mouth meant that I couldn’t make the sounds. I was alone, and what would happen next depended entirely on a bunch of strangers. The only thing I could think to do was try and get them to like me."
"If we allow gun violence to continue blighting communities of color, we have failed. But if we enact gun control measures that aid the police state in criminalizing Black and brown bodies, we have also failed. Taking into consideration who in our community bears the brunt of anti-LGBT violence, we need to be particularly conscious of this as we collectively strategize and move forward."
"Without CAD files, schematics, a bill of materials, and other crucial engineering documents, patents are not enough to implement designs. So while Tesla may no longer be filing aggressive lawsuits for patent infringement, “open source” isn’t the greatest analogy because a) the inventions were already public, and b) the write-ups do not contain the necessary information to replicate the design. This doesn’t mean that Tesla is a bad company; more likely, it just means that Musk has a good understanding of what will generate buzz in the media. “Copyleft,” a more accurate term, just doesn’t have the same ring."
"When I find myself getting mired down in detail, I often find it helpful to step back and look at things from a lean systems perspective."
"Two bodycon dresses and a swimsuit does not a slutty power lesbian make. As a part-time slutty power lesbian myself, I’d be happy to help Ms. Law correct course on her aesthetic."
"The fact that you’re working through all this now doesn’t say anything negative about you or the way you moved through life for the past 24 years. What you did then was valid, and what you’re doing now is valid; you don’t owe anyone an explanation. (And by the way, this applies even if you use a different identity label in the future. You don’t need to justify being true to your feelings as you feel them, even if they change.)"
"Since Dumbledore taught me that it does not do well to dwell on dreams and forget to live, I’ve been working very hard to make my dream of hot, alcoholic butterbeer a reality. And I’ve been wildly successful! I have found the perfect butterbeer recipe. Now when I look in the Mirror of Erised, I just see myself holding socks."
"I don’t know whether Galadriel has any dietary restrictions, but I do know that she’s originally from Valinor, a tropical land encircled by the sea of Ekkaia. So shrimp seem like a reasonably safe bet to me. You may want to check in with your date before making a similar assumption."
"Filipino chicken adobo is a delicious comfort food all year round, but I always find myself wanting to cook it in the winter. It heats my kitchen up and makes my entire apartment smell incredible. And did I mention how wonderful it tastes? It’s as delicious as the certainty you felt as a kid who knew 100% for sure that Santa Claus was real. But like, juicier."
"Women by themselves, doing wholly unremarkable things. These are things that happen all day, every day — yet we so rarely see those things reflected accurately in the literature being held up as “classic,” “universal,” or “important.” (Meanwhile, stories by men about men doing these exact same things are “required reading.” I am so bored of this.)"
"Honestly, it’s shocking. I actually gasped out loud when I reached the following note from Coda: “Would you stop changing my games? Stop adding lampposts to them?” Because: What. The. Fuck. What the fuck! Are you serious?!"
"Indeed, throughout much of the book, the only sure “facts” I knew came as I sorted through the scattered debris of pop culture tidbits. (Yes! Carrie did wreak havoc at the prom with her telekinesis. No! Rosemary did not birth a son too pure for the devil to possess.) As for the arcane autobiographical details, no matter how many notes I scribbled in the margins, full understanding was tantalizingly juuuust out of reach. (Why did the protagonist suddenly begin calling herself Carla? It’s because of the demon fucking, right? Or is it the memory of the abortion? Are you taunting me on purpose, Bellamy?)"
"This year’s New York Comic Con was held October 8-11 in the Javits Center, New York City. It is the largest pop culture convention on the East Coast, and similar to last year, it contained a wealth of programming and exhibits relevant to all your queer lady nerd interests. Let’s take a look!"
"Oh. My. Yonce. The downstairs was packed. Like, limpy soft touch flexi-dong packed. Cutlets and toilet paper down Charlize Theron‘s bra stuffed. Advance tickets had sold out days before, and the line stretched around the block as interested parties waited to get in."
"Hurray For The Riff Raff is the New Orleans-based queer Americana band that stopped your heart mid-beat with “The Body Electric’s” music video this January. They’re currently on tour, and according to Alynda, are playing the absolute best shows they’ve ever played. On a rare day off during a stopover in Oakland, Alynda and Yosi graciously chatted with Autostraddle about about their recent successes."
"There I was doing this iconic role, and I felt like I left my artistic soul on the stage. I wept after I came off because I had nothing else. I gave it all that night,” actress Sierra Boggess says nearly overrun with emotion as she describes her critically acclaimed performance as Christine Daaé in the 25th Anniversary of The Phantom of the Opera. “Beyond the press and all that stuff, it was one of the most artistically fulfilling experiences of my life. And then Andrew [Lloyd Webber] called me his angel of music, and it was just… it’s not to be believed, you know?"
"Bad With Money is published through Slate's Panopoly network, and was named one of the top 10 podcasts of 2016 by the New York Times. Laura appears in the April 11 episode, "Part of Living in a Country (aka Taxes), ft. Cecile Richards."